If you sat in an office all day today hating your life, I don’t feel bad for you. It sounds harsh, but it’s true. You’re responsible for yourself and YOU HAVE THE POWER TO DESIGN YOUR OWN LIFE. So ask yourself, if a year from now you’re doing the same thing you’re doing right now, what will your life be like?
Every day my inbox is flooded with well-intentioned messages from women that, if we’re being totally honest, read to me like lists of complaints: “I hate my job.” “My bf isn’t loving me how I want to be loved.” “I’m unfulfilled.” “I don’t have a passion.” “I’m bored.” “I’m stuck. etc. etc. Those complaints are then followed by a shit ton of excuses: “I don’t have the money.” “I don’t have the time.” “It seems like I have the worst luck ever.” Essentially, you’re letting yourself off the hook from having to make a big change in your life. It’s time to make changes, not excuses.
Have you accepted that doing things you don’t want to do is just “a part of life?” I want to let you in on a little known secret: You don’t have to do ANYTHING in life that you don’t want to do. BUT, here’s the thing: Your desire for change HAS to be greater than your desire to stay the same.
You don’t have to do anything in life that you don’t want to do. But your desire to change has to be greater than your desire to stay the same.
This could be the year your entire life changes. My entire life changed in a year. You just gotta LOVE YOURSELF enough to demand more and KNOW YOURSELF enough to know what you really want in life.
If you want to change your life, prove it. Put in the work that it takes to design and execute the life you want.
I put together the list of questions below to prompt you to dig deep, think bigger, and create a map for what it will look like when you live your life on your own terms. These questions have the power to transform your entire life, so take them seriously. Open your heart and be brave enough to “go there” with the tough questions and embrace whatever truths come to you in your answers. Some of these truths may be difficult to face, but seeing them clearly in writing is often all it takes to begin a massive positive shift in your life. I recommend setting aside a chunk of UNINTERRUPTED time where you can detach from the stressors in your life and focus on yourself so you can really flex your female & get the clarity you’re looking for. Light a candle, get out a pen and paper, and enjoy the process of self-discovery.
- What are the 5 things you love most about yourself?
- What parts of your life bring out the qualities you love most about yourself? What parts do not?
- What in your life gives you the most energy?
- What in your life drains your energy the most?
- What is your passion or purpose in life? If you don’t know, what do you feel is holding you back from discovering it?
- What’s the most exciting part of your life right now?
- What in your life is most holding you back? What would it take to let go of it? What would your life look like if you did?
- What are you most proud of in your life?
- If anything were possible, what would you do for work?
- If anything were possible, how would you spend your average weekday?
- If anything were possible, how would you spend your average weekend day?
- What would you love to happen this year, but often doubt that it really could?
- What would you love to happen this decade, but often doubt that it really could?
- What would you love to happen in your life, but often doubt that it really could?
- How would your life change if you put yourself first?
- How would your life be different if you weren’t afraid of failure?
- What would your life look like if you released attachment to what other people thought of you?
- What would your life look like if you couldn’t feel embarrassment or shame?
- What are you known for? What is your reputation?
- What do you want to be known for? What do you want your reputation to be?
- When’s the last time you were truly, deeply happy? What were you doing? Who were you with?
- What was the moment you felt most alive?
- What are 5 things that you can count on to bring you joy on demand?
- Who understands you best? Why? What do they know about you that others don’t?
- Who are you, really?
- What aspects of your life don’t reflect the true you?
- What are you doing when you feel most like yourself? Who are you with when you feel most like yourself?
- What or who stops you from feeling like yourself?
- What are the negative things you tell yourself about yourself? How have your fears and limiting beliefs held you back from designing the life you desire?
- What are your core values?
- In what ways does your current lifestyle reflect your core values, and in what ways does it not?
- How do you make difficult decisions? Do you come from a place of fear or abundance?
- Who are the people with whom you have the most meaningful relationships? What makes those relationships so special?
- What are you doing when you lose track of time? When you’re in such a state of flow that you forget to eat or sleep?
- Whose life do you most admire, and why?
- If I gave you 10 billion dollars today, what would you do tomorrow?
- What do people always go to you for advice on?
- What is your greatest hope for this year?
- How committed are you to achieving it?
- What is holding you back from that hope coming to fruition?
- Are you happy? If not, what would it take to make you happy right now?
- What will be your greatest contribution to the world?
- What are three things that if you don’t accomplish, you will regret?
- What do you want your legacy to be when you die?
- When you’re 100 years old, what would make you most proud to tell yourself today?
- What does it mean to you to be fulfilled?
- What does it mean to you to be your highest self?
- What does it mean to you to live your best life?
- How committed are you to living your best life?
- Are you the captain of your own life? Or does someone or something else have the wheel? What would it look like if you knew you could steer your ship anywhere you wanted? Where would you go and why?
Once you’ve answered these questions, take some time to reflect. What do you notice? What patterns do you see? Within the answers to these questions are the truths of what it would look like if you REFUSED to accept the status quo and started living your life on PURPOSE.
Obviously, if you don’t design your own life, the world will keep spinning and life will still happen to you. But you were meant for SO MUCH MORE than spending your life comparing yourself to other people on Insta, paying bills, and trying to get enough sleep.
So, is your desire to change greater than your desire to stay the same? I hope your answer is yes. I hope you choose to live your life intentionally so that you can create your own future (& I want to emphasize that one word: CREATE.) The life you want is all possible, but it’s not just going to “happen” to you; you have to CREATE it!
There is so much beauty in living a life that you create. A life that’s uniquely you. A life that just… fits.
As always, I’d love to hear from you! Which of these questions impacted you the most? And if you want my help creating a life that just fits, I’m here for you, just shoot me a note!